Three Wolves

I have read and reread the assigned talks this week. I was most struck by Elder Hafen talk; specifically how he says “every marriage will be tested repeatedly by three kinds of wolves”. The first time I read that I thought how is that possible? I have been married three times and did not think my marriages had been touched by wolves. Upon reading it again, I can see that the first marriage was visited by the first wolf, natural adversity and the third wolf, individualism although it makes sense why the third wolf came into that marriage. I was only married for seven months, my husband had Hodgkin’s disease when I married him so he became very self absorbed because of the cancer; totally understandable on my part. Then the first wolf took over and he lost the battle with cancer.

My second marriage to my eternal companion seemed to be visited by all three wolves mostly because of me. He died of complications due to Multiple Sclerosis. He truly was an angel; no matter what I ever did he always complemented me and told me how beautiful I was. I was the worst wolf two; one that would criticize things he did to try and help me, I became self absorbed so I would not have to deal with the reality of his illness; wolf three is a master manipulator.  When wolf one won the battle I felt terrible for way I have treated my eternal companion. I am so grateful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ and that I can be forgiven of my actions.

The marriage I have now is pretty good except I can see wolf two sneaking around; my husband often criticizes things I say and do. I never realized that until I reread this talk. I think we will have to talk about the three wolves and how they can affect our marriage.

I can see the adversary working hard to make marriage more difficult than it already is; everybody will have a bad day once in a while, the trick is to keep the Lord close. If you put Christ first in your marriage along with your spouse every else will work out the way it was intended, maybe not the way you wanted it too. I believe if you give your life to the Lord, He can make so much more of it then you can make alone.

How do you guys that are married feel about the three wolves? Those that are not, how would you suggest preventing them in marriage?